A taxi passenger tapped the driver on the
shoulder to ask him a question.The driver screamed,
lost control of the car, nearly hit a bus,
went up on the footpath, and stopped centimeters
from a shop window.
For a second everything went quiet in the cab,
then the driver said:
"Look mate, don't ever do that again.
You scared the daylights out of me!
" The passenger apologized and said,
"I didn't realize that a little tap
would scare you so much.
The driver replied,
"Sorry, it's not really your fault.
Today is my first day as a cab driver -
I've been driving a van carrying
dead bodies for the last 25 years."
Tuesday, January 31, 2006
Must Read
An old man, staying in a small south Indian town
came to visit his son in Bombay recently.
The son in his early thirties is a successful
businessman living with his wife and son.
The father, having spent most of his life
at his birthplace, hardlyunderstands a
splatter of Hindi or English, forget Marathi.
But hedoesn't care. 'I have come here to spend
a few days with my son and his family.
I don't have to go out and
socialize with the city people,' he said.
But the son is very excited about
his father's rare visit to Bombay.
He wants to make the best of it.
He and his wife want to
show him around the city.
And yes, the son enjoys those evening hours too,
when he and his father go out
and sitin a good bar, sipping
their favourite drink.
Face off
Last week he was in a very good mood.
'Let's go to a five star hotel's bar tonight,' he told his father.
It was a beautiful evening.Talking about everything!
under the sun they had a few drinks.
As usual they were offered some salad,
peanuts, wafers etc .as accompaniments with their drinks.
The old man being almost toothless was not much
interested in eating. But that day when they got up to leave,
he simply took a handful of chana (roasted grams)
and stuffed it in the fold of his dhoti.
He might have thought about
munching on them, sitting in the car, or whatever.
Unfortunately while walking in the lobby,
he missed a step and stumbled.
Down he went, scattering the chana on the plush carpet.
No problem .Now try to visualize that scenario.
Someone else in his son's place would have been
mortified, embarrassed to death. He might
have cursed not his father but his own s
elf for causing this awkward situation.
'Never again will I take my old
man to such hotels',
he would have vowed.
No sir, not this son. Gently, with a smile,
he helped his father get back on his feet. Instead !
of feeling irritated or angry, he was amused.
He found the whole incident very funny.
Laughing, they both went home and on
the way they decided to return to the
same place the following Sunday.
The old man liked the place.
Liked the chana too.
A son rises A few days back, at a friend's place
they both described this event
and made everybody laugh.
Weren't you embarrassed? Somebody asked the son.
'Oh, come on now' replied the son.
'He is my father. He talks in his native language,
prefers to wear a dhoti even to a posh city hotel, takes chana from
the bar to eat later, does whatever he feels like....
So what? Why should I feel embarrassed with
his nature and habits? Nobody has a
right to stop him from doing whatever
he feels comfortable with, as
long as it is not harmful to others.'
The son doesn't care what the staff
in the hotel thought about that incident.
He says 'they should be concerned
only with their bills an! d tips.
I am concerned about my father's happiness.'
The wife too totally agrees with the husband on this issue.
She feels there are enough other
qualities in her father- in- law to feel proud of.
Accept them .The above incident is not mentioned just to show the love
and devotion of a son for his father. More than love it is a matter of
understanding and a healthy respect for the other person's lifestyle.
A seventy plus old man doesn't want to change his lifestyle now. He
likes the way he eats or dresses or talks. In his eyes there is
nothing wrong with the old ways of living. And the son says, ok, fine.
Every body has a right to live as per his wish. Now at his age, why
should he be forced to learn to eat with a fork and knife, if he
doesn't want to? I will feel bad if he is doing something morally
wrong or indulging in some harmful activities. But otherwise it is
fine. I am not going to try to change him at this stage. He is my
f! ather. I love him, respect him.
Hey folks, can you think this way?
So many times we see people getting embarrassed by the so called
unsophisticated behaviour of their family members. They keep on
apologizing about their lack of class and manners or about their
drawbacks to outsiders. My wife can't speak proper English; she
doesn't know what's happening in the world, so I avoid taking her out
or introducing her to my friends and business associates...
My parents can't eat with a spoon and fork, so I don't take them to
restaurants.... My husband is working as an ordinary clerk, so I feel
awkward when I introduce him to my rich friends. My brother is
mentally challenged, so I don't feel like going out with him...
Are you plagued with such thoughts or do you meet such people who think
alike?
If you do, please ask yourself. Why do others or I feel this way?
Really what is there to feel ashamed of? Most of the people alwayshave this fear of other peoples' opinions and comments. What would
others say?
They think and try to alter their own way of living.
Sometimes unnecessarily. What is worse is they try to change their own
people too. And when they can't, they are ashamed, angry. And
apologetic to outsiders.
In fact, these are the people who have no respect for others and no
confidence in oneself. They try to copy others, try to be what they
are not, and constantly ask for outsiders' approval for their
behaviour. They don't care about the feelings of their family members
when they avoid or belittle them.
They don't think how happy his or her family member would feel if
he/she gets an opportunity to go to some swanky restaurant or a fun-
filled party. Your wife, mother, father, little sister, and old
aunt...all those people depending on you for their happiness. If you
don't fulfill their desires, who will?
They are what they are. We! are what we are. We don't have to change
ourselves to please strangers. And if you do, you are in for life long
misery.
In that case you would never dare taking your dhoti clad relative to a
five star hotel. And your father would never sit amongst your friends
and laugh his heart out over some funny incident.
An Excellent Moral
came to visit his son in Bombay recently.
The son in his early thirties is a successful
businessman living with his wife and son.
The father, having spent most of his life
at his birthplace, hardlyunderstands a
splatter of Hindi or English, forget Marathi.
But hedoesn't care. 'I have come here to spend
a few days with my son and his family.
I don't have to go out and
socialize with the city people,' he said.
But the son is very excited about
his father's rare visit to Bombay.
He wants to make the best of it.
He and his wife want to
show him around the city.
And yes, the son enjoys those evening hours too,
when he and his father go out
and sitin a good bar, sipping
their favourite drink.
Face off
Last week he was in a very good mood.
'Let's go to a five star hotel's bar tonight,' he told his father.
It was a beautiful evening.Talking about everything!
under the sun they had a few drinks.
As usual they were offered some salad,
peanuts, wafers etc .as accompaniments with their drinks.
The old man being almost toothless was not much
interested in eating. But that day when they got up to leave,
he simply took a handful of chana (roasted grams)
and stuffed it in the fold of his dhoti.
He might have thought about
munching on them, sitting in the car, or whatever.
Unfortunately while walking in the lobby,
he missed a step and stumbled.
Down he went, scattering the chana on the plush carpet.
No problem .Now try to visualize that scenario.
Someone else in his son's place would have been
mortified, embarrassed to death. He might
have cursed not his father but his own s
elf for causing this awkward situation.
'Never again will I take my old
man to such hotels',
he would have vowed.
No sir, not this son. Gently, with a smile,
he helped his father get back on his feet. Instead !
of feeling irritated or angry, he was amused.
He found the whole incident very funny.
Laughing, they both went home and on
the way they decided to return to the
same place the following Sunday.
The old man liked the place.
Liked the chana too.
A son rises A few days back, at a friend's place
they both described this event
and made everybody laugh.
Weren't you embarrassed? Somebody asked the son.
'Oh, come on now' replied the son.
'He is my father. He talks in his native language,
prefers to wear a dhoti even to a posh city hotel, takes chana from
the bar to eat later, does whatever he feels like....
So what? Why should I feel embarrassed with
his nature and habits? Nobody has a
right to stop him from doing whatever
he feels comfortable with, as
long as it is not harmful to others.'
The son doesn't care what the staff
in the hotel thought about that incident.
He says 'they should be concerned
only with their bills an! d tips.
I am concerned about my father's happiness.'
The wife too totally agrees with the husband on this issue.
She feels there are enough other
qualities in her father- in- law to feel proud of.
Accept them .The above incident is not mentioned just to show the love
and devotion of a son for his father. More than love it is a matter of
understanding and a healthy respect for the other person's lifestyle.
A seventy plus old man doesn't want to change his lifestyle now. He
likes the way he eats or dresses or talks. In his eyes there is
nothing wrong with the old ways of living. And the son says, ok, fine.
Every body has a right to live as per his wish. Now at his age, why
should he be forced to learn to eat with a fork and knife, if he
doesn't want to? I will feel bad if he is doing something morally
wrong or indulging in some harmful activities. But otherwise it is
fine. I am not going to try to change him at this stage. He is my
f! ather. I love him, respect him.
Hey folks, can you think this way?
So many times we see people getting embarrassed by the so called
unsophisticated behaviour of their family members. They keep on
apologizing about their lack of class and manners or about their
drawbacks to outsiders. My wife can't speak proper English; she
doesn't know what's happening in the world, so I avoid taking her out
or introducing her to my friends and business associates...
My parents can't eat with a spoon and fork, so I don't take them to
restaurants.... My husband is working as an ordinary clerk, so I feel
awkward when I introduce him to my rich friends. My brother is
mentally challenged, so I don't feel like going out with him...
Are you plagued with such thoughts or do you meet such people who think
alike?
If you do, please ask yourself. Why do others or I feel this way?
Really what is there to feel ashamed of? Most of the people alwayshave this fear of other peoples' opinions and comments. What would
others say?
They think and try to alter their own way of living.
Sometimes unnecessarily. What is worse is they try to change their own
people too. And when they can't, they are ashamed, angry. And
apologetic to outsiders.
In fact, these are the people who have no respect for others and no
confidence in oneself. They try to copy others, try to be what they
are not, and constantly ask for outsiders' approval for their
behaviour. They don't care about the feelings of their family members
when they avoid or belittle them.
They don't think how happy his or her family member would feel if
he/she gets an opportunity to go to some swanky restaurant or a fun-
filled party. Your wife, mother, father, little sister, and old
aunt...all those people depending on you for their happiness. If you
don't fulfill their desires, who will?
They are what they are. We! are what we are. We don't have to change
ourselves to please strangers. And if you do, you are in for life long
misery.
In that case you would never dare taking your dhoti clad relative to a
five star hotel. And your father would never sit amongst your friends
and laugh his heart out over some funny incident.
An Excellent Moral
Wednesday, January 25, 2006
Moral - Good One...
An old man lived alone in Baramati.
He wanted to spade his potato garden,
but it was very hard work.
His only son, who would have helped him,
was in prison. The old man wrote a letter to his son
and mentioned his situation:
Dear Son, I am feeling pretty bad because it looks like
I won't be able to plant my potato garden this year.
I hate to miss doing the garden, because your mother
always loved planting time. I'm just getting too old to be
digging up a garden plot. If you were here, all my troubles
would be over. I know you would dig the plot for me,
if you weren't in prison.
Love, Dad
Shortly, the old man received this telegram:
"For Heaven's sake, Dad, don't dig up the garden!!
That's where I buried the GUNS!!" At 4 a.m.
the next morning, a dozen CBI agents and local
police officers showed up and dug up the entire garden
without finding any guns. Confused, the old man wrote a
nother note to his son telling him what happened,
and asked him what to do next.
His son's reply was:
"Go ahead and plant your potatoes, Dad.
It's the best I could do for you from here."
Moral: No Matter Where You Are In The World,
If You Have Decided To Do Something Deep
From Your Heart You Can Do It.
It Is The Thought That Matters Not
Where You Are Or Where The Person Is.
He wanted to spade his potato garden,
but it was very hard work.
His only son, who would have helped him,
was in prison. The old man wrote a letter to his son
and mentioned his situation:
Dear Son, I am feeling pretty bad because it looks like
I won't be able to plant my potato garden this year.
I hate to miss doing the garden, because your mother
always loved planting time. I'm just getting too old to be
digging up a garden plot. If you were here, all my troubles
would be over. I know you would dig the plot for me,
if you weren't in prison.
Love, Dad
Shortly, the old man received this telegram:
"For Heaven's sake, Dad, don't dig up the garden!!
That's where I buried the GUNS!!" At 4 a.m.
the next morning, a dozen CBI agents and local
police officers showed up and dug up the entire garden
without finding any guns. Confused, the old man wrote a
nother note to his son telling him what happened,
and asked him what to do next.
His son's reply was:
"Go ahead and plant your potatoes, Dad.
It's the best I could do for you from here."
Moral: No Matter Where You Are In The World,
If You Have Decided To Do Something Deep
From Your Heart You Can Do It.
It Is The Thought That Matters Not
Where You Are Or Where The Person Is.
Cherish Every Moment Of Your Life
I've been sitting around this life for years,
Not enough laughs and too many tears.
Trying to figure out where it all went,
These wasted years that I have spent.
Searching for something to go beyond,
Life's a stone skipping across a pond.
At the last skip, it hits with a splash,
Down the stone sinks, gone in a flash.
Pushing and pulling, it's tearing apart,
Poking and prodding an underused heart.
This dark velvet curtain that hides my soul,
Living this life has taken it's toll.
In a flash of bright light, the curtain is torn,
Tumbling down all tattered and worn.
Revealing new life, a child within,
Born free of hate, of suffering and sin.
Now my eyes see what has never been told,
Striving forth happy, confident and bold.
Into a world that's unfamiliar but friendly,
Into this new life my spirit will send me.
Living and laughing, loving it all,
I stood myself up and answered the call.
The darkness has gone, replaced by the light,
I gave up the darkness with hardly a fight.
I've been sitting around this life for years,
With laughter aplenty and hardly a tear.
Now I can see just where it all went,
Cherish every moment of this new life I've spent.
Not enough laughs and too many tears.
Trying to figure out where it all went,
These wasted years that I have spent.
Searching for something to go beyond,
Life's a stone skipping across a pond.
At the last skip, it hits with a splash,
Down the stone sinks, gone in a flash.
Pushing and pulling, it's tearing apart,
Poking and prodding an underused heart.
This dark velvet curtain that hides my soul,
Living this life has taken it's toll.
In a flash of bright light, the curtain is torn,
Tumbling down all tattered and worn.
Revealing new life, a child within,
Born free of hate, of suffering and sin.
Now my eyes see what has never been told,
Striving forth happy, confident and bold.
Into a world that's unfamiliar but friendly,
Into this new life my spirit will send me.
Living and laughing, loving it all,
I stood myself up and answered the call.
The darkness has gone, replaced by the light,
I gave up the darkness with hardly a fight.
I've been sitting around this life for years,
With laughter aplenty and hardly a tear.
Now I can see just where it all went,
Cherish every moment of this new life I've spent.
Tuesday, January 24, 2006
Effective Communication
Jack and Max are walking from religious service.
Jack wonders whether it would be
all right to smoke while praying.
Max replies, "Why don't you ask the Priest?"
So Jack goes up to the Priest and asks,
"Priest, may I smoke while I pray?"
But the Priest says, "No, my son, you may not.
That's utter disrespect to our religion."
Jack goes back to his friend and
tells him what the good Priest told him.
Max says, "I'm not surprised.
You asked the wrong question.
Let me try."
And so Max goes up to the Priest and asks,
"Priest, may I pray while I smoke?"
To which the Priest eagerly replies,
"By all means, my son.
Moral: The reply you get depends
on the question you ask.
For Example: Can I work on this
project while I'm on leave?
Jack wonders whether it would be
all right to smoke while praying.
Max replies, "Why don't you ask the Priest?"
So Jack goes up to the Priest and asks,
"Priest, may I smoke while I pray?"
But the Priest says, "No, my son, you may not.
That's utter disrespect to our religion."
Jack goes back to his friend and
tells him what the good Priest told him.
Max says, "I'm not surprised.
You asked the wrong question.
Let me try."
And so Max goes up to the Priest and asks,
"Priest, may I pray while I smoke?"
To which the Priest eagerly replies,
"By all means, my son.
Moral: The reply you get depends
on the question you ask.
For Example: Can I work on this
project while I'm on leave?
Internationally acclaimed BEST JOKE!
This particular joke won an award for the best joke
in a competition organized in Britain and this joke
was sent by an Indian Engineer......
An MBA and an Engineer go on a camping trip,
set up their tent, and fall asleep.
Some hours later,
the Engineer wakes his MBA friend.
"Look up at the sky and tell me what you see?"
The MBA replies, "I see millions of stars."
The Engineer asks "What does that tell you?"
The MBA ponders for a minute:
"Astronomically speaking, it tells
me that there are millions of galaxies and
potentially billions of planets.
Astrologically, it tells me that Saturn is in Leo.
Time wise, it appears to be approximately
a quarter past three.
Theologically, it's evident the Lord is
all-powerful and we are small and insignificant.
Meteorologically, it seems we will
have a beautiful day tomorrow.
What does it tell you?"
.
.
.
.
.
The Engineer friend is silent for a
moment, and then speaks.
"Practically...Someone has stolen our tent".
in a competition organized in Britain and this joke
was sent by an Indian Engineer......
An MBA and an Engineer go on a camping trip,
set up their tent, and fall asleep.
Some hours later,
the Engineer wakes his MBA friend.
"Look up at the sky and tell me what you see?"
The MBA replies, "I see millions of stars."
The Engineer asks "What does that tell you?"
The MBA ponders for a minute:
"Astronomically speaking, it tells
me that there are millions of galaxies and
potentially billions of planets.
Astrologically, it tells me that Saturn is in Leo.
Time wise, it appears to be approximately
a quarter past three.
Theologically, it's evident the Lord is
all-powerful and we are small and insignificant.
Meteorologically, it seems we will
have a beautiful day tomorrow.
What does it tell you?"
.
.
.
.
.
The Engineer friend is silent for a
moment, and then speaks.
"Practically...Someone has stolen our tent".
Happy Dad
Everyone in the wedding ceremony was
watching the radiant bride as her
father escorted her down the aisle to give away to groom.
They reached the altar and the waiting groom,
the bride kissed her
father and placed something in his hand.
Everyone in the room was wondering
what was given tothe father by bride.
The father could feel the suspense in
the air and all eyes were on him
to divulge the secret and say something.
So he announced
"Ladies and Gentlemen today
is the luckiest day of my life."
Then he raises his hands with
what his daughter gave him and continued,
"My daughter
.
.
.
.
.
.
finally returned my credit card to me."
The whole audience including priest
started laughing except the poor groom.
watching the radiant bride as her
father escorted her down the aisle to give away to groom.
They reached the altar and the waiting groom,
the bride kissed her
father and placed something in his hand.
Everyone in the room was wondering
what was given tothe father by bride.
The father could feel the suspense in
the air and all eyes were on him
to divulge the secret and say something.
So he announced
"Ladies and Gentlemen today
is the luckiest day of my life."
Then he raises his hands with
what his daughter gave him and continued,
"My daughter
.
.
.
.
.
.
finally returned my credit card to me."
The whole audience including priest
started laughing except the poor groom.
Enjoy..
Tumko dekha....tumko dekha...
Tumko dekha....to yeh khayal aaya
paaglon ke stock mein naya maal aaya!
=====================================
Idhar khuda hai, udar khuda hai,
jidar dekho udar khuda hai,
idhar-udhar bus khuda hi khuda hai
jidhar nahi khuda hai....udhar kal khudega!
======================================
The night is dark, the moon is high,
I stop my car, u ask why?
I come close to u, u feel shy,
I tell u those three magical words....
Hye La, Puncture!!!
======================================
Tumsa koi dusara jameen par hua
to rab se shikayat hogi....
Ek to jehlla nahi jata
doosra aa gaya to kya halat hogi!!!
======================================
Koi pathar se na maare mere dewaane ko........
koi pathar se na maare mere dewaane ko........
koi pathar se na maare mere dewaane ko........
abe aage bhi to bol...............
nuclear power ka jamaana hai, bomb se udaa do saale ko...................
======================================
tuhaar chehraa moti samaan ..
tuhaar chehraa moti samaan...
moti hamaar kutte ka naam!!
===========================================================
Durakht ke paymane pe chilman E husn ka furkat se sharmana...
Durakht ke paymane pe chilman E husn ka furkat se sharmana...
Ye line samajh me aaye to mujhe zaroor batana!!
===========================================================
tere dar pe sanam hazar baar aayenge,
tere dar pe sanam hazar baar aayenge.....
ghanti bajayenge aur bhaag jayenge !!
===========================================================
Jis waqt khuda ne tumhe banaya hoga, ek saroor sa uske
dil pe chaya hoga...pehle socha hoga tujhe jannat mein
rakh lun..phir usse zoo ka khayal aaya hoga!!!
===========================================================
Mere marne ke baad mere doston,
yu aansoo na bahana,
Agar meri yaad aaye to,
sidhe upar chale aana!!
===========================================================
Kyon apni kabar khud-hi khod raha hai Galib...
Kyon apni kabar khud-hi khod raha hai Galib...
La, phawda mujhe de!!
===========================================================
Tumko dekha to ek khyal aaya
Tumko dekha to ek khyal aaya
Tumhari saheli ko dekha to doosra khayal aaya!!
===========================================================
Na woh inkaar karti hai
Na woh ikraar karti hai
KAMBAKHT mere hi sapno mein aakar
Mere dost se pyaar karti hai.
===========================================================
Jab Jab gire Baadal, Teri Yaad aayi
Jhoom ke barsa Saawan, Teri Yaad aayi
Bheega main,lekin phir bhi teri Yaad aayi
Kyon na aaye teri yaad? Tune jo chatri ab tak nahi lautai...
===========================================================
Bolaa dukaan-daar, ke kyaa chahiye tumhain
Jo bhii kaho ge merii dukaan per wo paoge
maine kahaa ke kutte ke khaane kaa cake hai
bolaa yahiin pe khaaoge yaa leke jaaoge!!!!:?
===========================================================
Unki gali ke chakkar kaat kaat kar,
Kutte bhi hamare yaar ho gaye,
Wo to hamare ho na sake,
Hum kutton ke sardar ho gaye...
===========================================================
haseen tum ho to bure hum bi nahi,
mahlon mein tum ho to sadak par hum bhi nahi,
pyar karke kehte ho shaadi shuda ho,
kaan kholkar sunlo. kunware hum bhi nahi.
===========================================================
Macchar ne jo kata... dil main mere junoon tha.
Khujli hui itni... dil be-sukoon tha.
Pakada to chod diya yeh soch kar ki....
sale ki ragon main apna hi khoon tha!
==========================================================
Aaj didar, kal yaar, parso pyar, phir ekrar, aur phir-intezaar,
phir-takrar,phir-darar, saari mehnat-bekar, aur akhir mein-Ek aur
devdas at beer bar!
Tumko dekha....to yeh khayal aaya
paaglon ke stock mein naya maal aaya!
=====================================
Idhar khuda hai, udar khuda hai,
jidar dekho udar khuda hai,
idhar-udhar bus khuda hi khuda hai
jidhar nahi khuda hai....udhar kal khudega!
======================================
The night is dark, the moon is high,
I stop my car, u ask why?
I come close to u, u feel shy,
I tell u those three magical words....
Hye La, Puncture!!!
======================================
Tumsa koi dusara jameen par hua
to rab se shikayat hogi....
Ek to jehlla nahi jata
doosra aa gaya to kya halat hogi!!!
======================================
Koi pathar se na maare mere dewaane ko........
koi pathar se na maare mere dewaane ko........
koi pathar se na maare mere dewaane ko........
abe aage bhi to bol...............
nuclear power ka jamaana hai, bomb se udaa do saale ko...................
======================================
tuhaar chehraa moti samaan ..
tuhaar chehraa moti samaan...
moti hamaar kutte ka naam!!
===========================================================
Durakht ke paymane pe chilman E husn ka furkat se sharmana...
Durakht ke paymane pe chilman E husn ka furkat se sharmana...
Ye line samajh me aaye to mujhe zaroor batana!!
===========================================================
tere dar pe sanam hazar baar aayenge,
tere dar pe sanam hazar baar aayenge.....
ghanti bajayenge aur bhaag jayenge !!
===========================================================
Jis waqt khuda ne tumhe banaya hoga, ek saroor sa uske
dil pe chaya hoga...pehle socha hoga tujhe jannat mein
rakh lun..phir usse zoo ka khayal aaya hoga!!!
===========================================================
Mere marne ke baad mere doston,
yu aansoo na bahana,
Agar meri yaad aaye to,
sidhe upar chale aana!!
===========================================================
Kyon apni kabar khud-hi khod raha hai Galib...
Kyon apni kabar khud-hi khod raha hai Galib...
La, phawda mujhe de!!
===========================================================
Tumko dekha to ek khyal aaya
Tumko dekha to ek khyal aaya
Tumhari saheli ko dekha to doosra khayal aaya!!
===========================================================
Na woh inkaar karti hai
Na woh ikraar karti hai
KAMBAKHT mere hi sapno mein aakar
Mere dost se pyaar karti hai.
===========================================================
Jab Jab gire Baadal, Teri Yaad aayi
Jhoom ke barsa Saawan, Teri Yaad aayi
Bheega main,lekin phir bhi teri Yaad aayi
Kyon na aaye teri yaad? Tune jo chatri ab tak nahi lautai...
===========================================================
Bolaa dukaan-daar, ke kyaa chahiye tumhain
Jo bhii kaho ge merii dukaan per wo paoge
maine kahaa ke kutte ke khaane kaa cake hai
bolaa yahiin pe khaaoge yaa leke jaaoge!!!!:?
===========================================================
Unki gali ke chakkar kaat kaat kar,
Kutte bhi hamare yaar ho gaye,
Wo to hamare ho na sake,
Hum kutton ke sardar ho gaye...
===========================================================
haseen tum ho to bure hum bi nahi,
mahlon mein tum ho to sadak par hum bhi nahi,
pyar karke kehte ho shaadi shuda ho,
kaan kholkar sunlo. kunware hum bhi nahi.
===========================================================
Macchar ne jo kata... dil main mere junoon tha.
Khujli hui itni... dil be-sukoon tha.
Pakada to chod diya yeh soch kar ki....
sale ki ragon main apna hi khoon tha!
==========================================================
Aaj didar, kal yaar, parso pyar, phir ekrar, aur phir-intezaar,
phir-takrar,phir-darar, saari mehnat-bekar, aur akhir mein-Ek aur
devdas at beer bar!
Monday, January 23, 2006
He He....
Once a Hindu, Muslim and our dear Santa Singh are
standing when a Britishercomes and asks
"Hey guys what are your favorite flowers?
"Hindu: "Lotus"
Britisher: "Ha I clean my shit with that!
"Hindu is surprised and angry as lotus being
our national flower.
Muslim: "Chameli"
Britisher: "Ha I clean my shit with that!
"Muslim also surprised and angry.
Britisher: "sardarji, what is your favorite flower?
"Patriotic Santa: "CACTUS!
ab kar le saaf!
standing when a Britishercomes and asks
"Hey guys what are your favorite flowers?
"Hindu: "Lotus"
Britisher: "Ha I clean my shit with that!
"Hindu is surprised and angry as lotus being
our national flower.
Muslim: "Chameli"
Britisher: "Ha I clean my shit with that!
"Muslim also surprised and angry.
Britisher: "sardarji, what is your favorite flower?
"Patriotic Santa: "CACTUS!
ab kar le saaf!
Mathematician's Maths
Long ago, a clever mathematician used to cheat people.
Once he borrowed Rs.4000/- from a rich man.
After a few days, he borrowed Rs.2000/-
from the same man.
Many days passed, the mathematician did not
return themoney to the rich man.
The rich man went to the mathematician
and asked to return the money.
But to his great surprise, the mathematician replied t
hat there is no need to pay the debt.
"See here, friend" said the mathematician
" the sum of 4000 and 2000 is equal to zero,
so I do not have any balance to pay".
The rich man took the matter to the court.
When the judge came to know this, he was astonished.
He asked the mathematician to prove
that sum of 4000 and 2000 is zero, and not 6000.
The Clever mathematician agreed. He said:
let a = 4000, b = 2000 and c = 6000
a + b = c
Multiply both sides by a + b
(a + b) (a + b) = c (a + b)
a X a + ab + ba + b X b = ca + cb
a X a + ab - ca = cb - b X b - ba
a( a + b -c) = -b(a + b - c)
so a = - b
so a + b = 0
Hence by putting the values of "a" and "b"
as 4000 and2000 respectively,
their sum is zero, so themathematician
saw no need to pay any money to the richman.
The above calculation has
no doubt surprised you as it did the judge.
Once he borrowed Rs.4000/- from a rich man.
After a few days, he borrowed Rs.2000/-
from the same man.
Many days passed, the mathematician did not
return themoney to the rich man.
The rich man went to the mathematician
and asked to return the money.
But to his great surprise, the mathematician replied t
hat there is no need to pay the debt.
"See here, friend" said the mathematician
" the sum of 4000 and 2000 is equal to zero,
so I do not have any balance to pay".
The rich man took the matter to the court.
When the judge came to know this, he was astonished.
He asked the mathematician to prove
that sum of 4000 and 2000 is zero, and not 6000.
The Clever mathematician agreed. He said:
let a = 4000, b = 2000 and c = 6000
a + b = c
Multiply both sides by a + b
(a + b) (a + b) = c (a + b)
a X a + ab + ba + b X b = ca + cb
a X a + ab - ca = cb - b X b - ba
a( a + b -c) = -b(a + b - c)
so a = - b
so a + b = 0
Hence by putting the values of "a" and "b"
as 4000 and2000 respectively,
their sum is zero, so themathematician
saw no need to pay any money to the richman.
The above calculation has
no doubt surprised you as it did the judge.
A Nice Article about Love - by Swami Vivekananda
I once had a friend who grew to be very close to me.
Once when we were sitting at the
edge of a swimming pool,
she filled the palm of her hand with some water
and held it before me, and said this:
"You see this water carefully contained on my hand?
It symbolizes Love."This was how I saw it:
As long as you keep your hand caringly open
and allow it to remain there,
it will always be there.
However, if you attempt to close your fingers round it
and try to posses it, it will spill
through the first cracks it finds.
This is the greatest mistake
that people do when they meet love...
they try to posses it, they demand, they expect...
and just like the water spilling out of your hand,
love will retrieve from you .
For love is meant to be free, you cannot change its nature.
If there are people you love, allow them to be free beings.
Give and don't expect.Advise, but don't order.
Ask, but never demand.It might sound simple,
but it is a lesson that may take
a lifetime to truly practice.
It is the secret to true love.
To truly practice it,
you must sincerely feel no expectations
from those who you love,
and yet an unconditional caring.
"Passing thought... Life is not measured by the number
of breaths we take; but by the moments
that take our breath away.....
Life is beautiful!!! Live it !!!
Once when we were sitting at the
edge of a swimming pool,
she filled the palm of her hand with some water
and held it before me, and said this:
"You see this water carefully contained on my hand?
It symbolizes Love."This was how I saw it:
As long as you keep your hand caringly open
and allow it to remain there,
it will always be there.
However, if you attempt to close your fingers round it
and try to posses it, it will spill
through the first cracks it finds.
This is the greatest mistake
that people do when they meet love...
they try to posses it, they demand, they expect...
and just like the water spilling out of your hand,
love will retrieve from you .
For love is meant to be free, you cannot change its nature.
If there are people you love, allow them to be free beings.
Give and don't expect.Advise, but don't order.
Ask, but never demand.It might sound simple,
but it is a lesson that may take
a lifetime to truly practice.
It is the secret to true love.
To truly practice it,
you must sincerely feel no expectations
from those who you love,
and yet an unconditional caring.
"Passing thought... Life is not measured by the number
of breaths we take; but by the moments
that take our breath away.....
Life is beautiful!!! Live it !!!
Friday, January 20, 2006
**Gud one...**
The husband, although very much in love,
couldn't wait to go out on the town
and party with his old buddies.
So, he said to his new wife,
"Honey, I'll be right back."
"Where are you going, coochy cooh?" asked the wife.
"I'm going to the bar, pretty face.
I'm going to have a beer."
The wife said, "You want a beer, my love?"
She opened the door to the refrigerator
and showed him 25 different kinds of beer,
brands from 12 different countries:
Germany, Holland, Japan, India, etc.
The husband didn't know what to do,
and the only thing that he could think of saying was,
"Yes, lolly pop...but at the bar...
you know...they have frozen glasses..."
He didn't get to finish the sentence,
because the wife interrupted him by saying,
"You want a frozen glass, puppy face?"
She took a huge beer mug out of the freezer,
so frozen that she was getting chills just holding it.
The husband, looking a bit pale, said,
"Yes, tootsie roll, but at the bar they have those
hors d'oeuvres that are really delicious...
I won't be long, I'll be right back. I promise. OK?"
"You want hors d'oeuvres, poochi pooh?"
She opened the oven and took out
5 dishes of different hors d'oeuvres: chicken wings,
pigs in blankets, mushroom caps, pork strips, etc.
"But my sweet honey... at the bar...
you know... there's swearing,
dirty words and all that..."
"You want dirty words, cutie pie?...
"LISTEN UP, D***HEAD! DRINK YOUR F***IN
BEER IN YOUR DAMN FROZEN MUG
AND EAT YOUR MOTHERFU***N SNACKS,
BECAUSE YOU ARE MARRIED NOW,
YOU AREN'T GOING ANYWHERE! GOT IT, AS**OLE?" .....
and, they lived happily ever after!
couldn't wait to go out on the town
and party with his old buddies.
So, he said to his new wife,
"Honey, I'll be right back."
"Where are you going, coochy cooh?" asked the wife.
"I'm going to the bar, pretty face.
I'm going to have a beer."
The wife said, "You want a beer, my love?"
She opened the door to the refrigerator
and showed him 25 different kinds of beer,
brands from 12 different countries:
Germany, Holland, Japan, India, etc.
The husband didn't know what to do,
and the only thing that he could think of saying was,
"Yes, lolly pop...but at the bar...
you know...they have frozen glasses..."
He didn't get to finish the sentence,
because the wife interrupted him by saying,
"You want a frozen glass, puppy face?"
She took a huge beer mug out of the freezer,
so frozen that she was getting chills just holding it.
The husband, looking a bit pale, said,
"Yes, tootsie roll, but at the bar they have those
hors d'oeuvres that are really delicious...
I won't be long, I'll be right back. I promise. OK?"
"You want hors d'oeuvres, poochi pooh?"
She opened the oven and took out
5 dishes of different hors d'oeuvres: chicken wings,
pigs in blankets, mushroom caps, pork strips, etc.
"But my sweet honey... at the bar...
you know... there's swearing,
dirty words and all that..."
"You want dirty words, cutie pie?...
"LISTEN UP, D***HEAD! DRINK YOUR F***IN
BEER IN YOUR DAMN FROZEN MUG
AND EAT YOUR MOTHERFU***N SNACKS,
BECAUSE YOU ARE MARRIED NOW,
YOU AREN'T GOING ANYWHERE! GOT IT, AS**OLE?" .....
and, they lived happily ever after!
Chat with God
Do you sometimes feel life has become too hectic? Do you see problems around you and don't know what to do? Are you really having peace of mind?
Spare some time and read this excellent write-up and you will surely get the answers of the above questions. Chat with God
God: Hello. Did you call me?
Me: Called you? No. Who is this?
God: This is GOD. I heard your prayers. So I thought I will chat.
Me: I do pray. Just makes me feel good. I am actually busy now. I am In the midst of something.
God: What are you busy at? Ants are busy too.
Me: Don't know. But I can't find free time. Life has become hectic.
It's rush hour all the time.
God: Sure. Activity gets you busy. But productivity gets you results.
Activity consumes time. Productivity frees it.
Me: I understand. But I still cant figure out. By the way,
I was not expecting YOU to buzz me on instant messaging chat.
God: Well I wanted to resolve your fight for time,
by giving you some clarity.
In this net era, I wanted to reach you through
the medium you are comfortable with.
Me: Tell me, why has life become complicated now?
God: Stop analyzing life. Just live it.
Analysis is what makes it complicated.
Me: Why are we then constantly unhappy?
God: Your today is the tomorrow that you worried about yesterday.
You are worrying because you are analyzing.
Worrying has become your habit. That's why you are not happy.
Me: But how can we not worry when there is so much uncertainty?
God: Uncertainty is inevitable, but worrying is optional.
Me: But then, there is so much pain due to uncertainty..
God: Pain is inevitable, but suffering is optional.
Me: If suffering is optional, why do good people always suffer?
God: Diamond cannot be polished without friction.
Gold cannot be purified without fire.
Good people go through trials, but don't suffer.
With that experience their life become better not bitter.
Me: You mean to say such experience is useful?
God: Yes. Experience is a hard teacher.
She gives the test first and the lessons afterwards.
Me: But still, why should we go through such tests?
Why can't we be free from problems?
God: Problems are purposeful roadblocks
offering beneficial lessons to enhance mental strength.
Inner strength comes from struggle and endurance,
not when you are free from problems.
Me: Frankly in the midst of so many problems,
we don't we know where we
are heading.
God: If you look outside you will not
know where you are heading.
Look inside.
Looking outside, you dream.
Looking inside, you awaken.
Eyes provide sight. Heart provides insight.
Me: Sometimes not succeeding fast seems to
hurt more than moving in the right direction.
What should I do?
God: Success is a measure decided by others.
Satisfaction is a measure decided by you.
You work with the compass.
Let others work with the clock.
Me: In tough times, how do I stay motivated?
God: Always look at how far you have come
rather than how far you have to go.
Always count your blessing,
not what you are missing.
God: When they suffer they ask, "why me?"
When they prosper, they never ask "Why me".
Everyone wishes to have truth on their side,
but few want to be on the side of the truth.
Me: Sometimes I ask, who I am,
why am I here. I can't get an answer.
God: Seek not to find who you are,
but to determine who you want to be.
Stop looking for a purpose as to
why you are here. Create it.
Life is not a process of discovery
but a process of creation.
Me: How can I get the best out of life?
God: Face your past without regret.
Handle your present with confidence.
Prepare for the future without fear.
Me: One last question. Sometimes I feel
my prayers are not answered.
God: There are no unanswered prayers.
At times the answer is NO.
Me: Thank you for this wonderful chat.
God: Well. Keep the faith and drop the fear.
Don't believe your doubts and don't doubt your beliefs.
Life is a mystery to solve not a problem to resolve. Trust me.
Life is wonderful if you know how to live.
Yours Ever,
Life
Spare some time and read this excellent write-up and you will surely get the answers of the above questions. Chat with God
God: Hello. Did you call me?
Me: Called you? No. Who is this?
God: This is GOD. I heard your prayers. So I thought I will chat.
Me: I do pray. Just makes me feel good. I am actually busy now. I am In the midst of something.
God: What are you busy at? Ants are busy too.
Me: Don't know. But I can't find free time. Life has become hectic.
It's rush hour all the time.
God: Sure. Activity gets you busy. But productivity gets you results.
Activity consumes time. Productivity frees it.
Me: I understand. But I still cant figure out. By the way,
I was not expecting YOU to buzz me on instant messaging chat.
God: Well I wanted to resolve your fight for time,
by giving you some clarity.
In this net era, I wanted to reach you through
the medium you are comfortable with.
Me: Tell me, why has life become complicated now?
God: Stop analyzing life. Just live it.
Analysis is what makes it complicated.
Me: Why are we then constantly unhappy?
God: Your today is the tomorrow that you worried about yesterday.
You are worrying because you are analyzing.
Worrying has become your habit. That's why you are not happy.
Me: But how can we not worry when there is so much uncertainty?
God: Uncertainty is inevitable, but worrying is optional.
Me: But then, there is so much pain due to uncertainty..
God: Pain is inevitable, but suffering is optional.
Me: If suffering is optional, why do good people always suffer?
God: Diamond cannot be polished without friction.
Gold cannot be purified without fire.
Good people go through trials, but don't suffer.
With that experience their life become better not bitter.
Me: You mean to say such experience is useful?
God: Yes. Experience is a hard teacher.
She gives the test first and the lessons afterwards.
Me: But still, why should we go through such tests?
Why can't we be free from problems?
God: Problems are purposeful roadblocks
offering beneficial lessons to enhance mental strength.
Inner strength comes from struggle and endurance,
not when you are free from problems.
Me: Frankly in the midst of so many problems,
we don't we know where we
are heading.
God: If you look outside you will not
know where you are heading.
Look inside.
Looking outside, you dream.
Looking inside, you awaken.
Eyes provide sight. Heart provides insight.
Me: Sometimes not succeeding fast seems to
hurt more than moving in the right direction.
What should I do?
God: Success is a measure decided by others.
Satisfaction is a measure decided by you.
You work with the compass.
Let others work with the clock.
Me: In tough times, how do I stay motivated?
God: Always look at how far you have come
rather than how far you have to go.
Always count your blessing,
not what you are missing.
God: When they suffer they ask, "why me?"
When they prosper, they never ask "Why me".
Everyone wishes to have truth on their side,
but few want to be on the side of the truth.
Me: Sometimes I ask, who I am,
why am I here. I can't get an answer.
God: Seek not to find who you are,
but to determine who you want to be.
Stop looking for a purpose as to
why you are here. Create it.
Life is not a process of discovery
but a process of creation.
Me: How can I get the best out of life?
God: Face your past without regret.
Handle your present with confidence.
Prepare for the future without fear.
Me: One last question. Sometimes I feel
my prayers are not answered.
God: There are no unanswered prayers.
At times the answer is NO.
Me: Thank you for this wonderful chat.
God: Well. Keep the faith and drop the fear.
Don't believe your doubts and don't doubt your beliefs.
Life is a mystery to solve not a problem to resolve. Trust me.
Life is wonderful if you know how to live.
Yours Ever,
Life
~~~Bad-Day~~~
A fierce gust of wind blew 45-year-old Vittorio Luise's car into a river near Naples, Italy in 1983. He managed to break out a window, climb out, and swim to shore-where a tree blew over and killed him.
~~~Bad-Day~~~
Mike Stewart, 31, of Dallas was filming a public service movie in 1983 on "The Dangers of Low-Level Bridges" when the truck he was standing on passed under a low-level bridge-killing him.
~~~Bad-Day~~~
Walter Hallas, a 26-year-old store clerk in Leeds, England was so afraid of dentists that in 1979 he asked a fellow worker to try to cure his toothache by punching him in the jaw. The punch caused Hallas to fall down, hitting his head, and he died of a fractured skull.
~~~Bad-Day~~~
George Schwartz, owner of a factory in Providence, R.I. narrowly escaped death when a 1983 blast flattened his factory except for one wall. After treatment for minor injuries, he returned to the scene to search for his files. The remaining wall then collapsed on him, killing him instantly.
~~~Bad-Day~~~
Depressed since he couldn't find a job, 42-year-old Romolo Ribolla sat in his kitchen near Pisa, Italy with a gun in his hand, threatening to kill himself in 1981. His wife pleaded for him not to do it, and after about an hour, he burst into tears and threw the gun to the floor. It went off and killed his wife.
~~~Bad-Day~~~
In 1983, a Mrs. Carson of Lake Kushaqua, N.Y. was laid out in her coffin, presumed dead of heart disease. As mourners watched, she suddenly sat up. Her daughter dropped dead of fright.
~~~Bad-Day~~~
A man hit by a car in New York City in 1977 got up uninjured, but laid back down in front of the car when a bystander told him to pretend he was hurt so he could collect insurance money. The car then rolled forward and crushed him to death.
~~~Bad-Day~~~
Suprised while burgling a house in Antwerp, Belgium, a thief fled out the back door, clambered over a nine-foot wall, dropped down, and found himself in the city prison.
~~~Bad-Day~~~
Two German motorists had an all-too-literal head-on collision in heavy fog near the small town of Guetersloh. Each was guiding his car at a snail's pace from opposite directions but both near the middle of the road. At the moment of impact, their heads were both out of the widows where they smacked together. Both men were hospitalized with severe head injuries. Their cars weren't scratched.
~~~Bad-Day~~~
In a case of "one thing leading to another", seven men, aged 18-27 years, received jail sentences of 3-4 years each in Kingston-On-Thames, England in 1979, after a fight that started when one of the men threw a french fry at another while they stood waiting for a train.
~~~Bad-Day~~~
Hitting on the novel idea that he could end his wife's incessant nagging by giving her a good scare, Hungarian Jake Fen built an elaborate harness to make it look as if he had hanged himself. When his wife came home and saw him, she fainted. Hearing a disturbance, a neighbor came over and, finding what she thought were two corpses, seized the opportunity to loot the place. As she was leaving the room, her arms laden, the outraged and suspended Mr. Fen kicked her stoutly in the backside. This so suprised the lady that she dropped dead of a heart attack. Happily, Mr. Fen was acquitted of manslaughter, and he and his wife were reconciled.
~~~Bad-Day~~~
Mike Stewart, 31, of Dallas was filming a public service movie in 1983 on "The Dangers of Low-Level Bridges" when the truck he was standing on passed under a low-level bridge-killing him.
~~~Bad-Day~~~
Walter Hallas, a 26-year-old store clerk in Leeds, England was so afraid of dentists that in 1979 he asked a fellow worker to try to cure his toothache by punching him in the jaw. The punch caused Hallas to fall down, hitting his head, and he died of a fractured skull.
~~~Bad-Day~~~
George Schwartz, owner of a factory in Providence, R.I. narrowly escaped death when a 1983 blast flattened his factory except for one wall. After treatment for minor injuries, he returned to the scene to search for his files. The remaining wall then collapsed on him, killing him instantly.
~~~Bad-Day~~~
Depressed since he couldn't find a job, 42-year-old Romolo Ribolla sat in his kitchen near Pisa, Italy with a gun in his hand, threatening to kill himself in 1981. His wife pleaded for him not to do it, and after about an hour, he burst into tears and threw the gun to the floor. It went off and killed his wife.
~~~Bad-Day~~~
In 1983, a Mrs. Carson of Lake Kushaqua, N.Y. was laid out in her coffin, presumed dead of heart disease. As mourners watched, she suddenly sat up. Her daughter dropped dead of fright.
~~~Bad-Day~~~
A man hit by a car in New York City in 1977 got up uninjured, but laid back down in front of the car when a bystander told him to pretend he was hurt so he could collect insurance money. The car then rolled forward and crushed him to death.
~~~Bad-Day~~~
Suprised while burgling a house in Antwerp, Belgium, a thief fled out the back door, clambered over a nine-foot wall, dropped down, and found himself in the city prison.
~~~Bad-Day~~~
Two German motorists had an all-too-literal head-on collision in heavy fog near the small town of Guetersloh. Each was guiding his car at a snail's pace from opposite directions but both near the middle of the road. At the moment of impact, their heads were both out of the widows where they smacked together. Both men were hospitalized with severe head injuries. Their cars weren't scratched.
~~~Bad-Day~~~
In a case of "one thing leading to another", seven men, aged 18-27 years, received jail sentences of 3-4 years each in Kingston-On-Thames, England in 1979, after a fight that started when one of the men threw a french fry at another while they stood waiting for a train.
~~~Bad-Day~~~
Hitting on the novel idea that he could end his wife's incessant nagging by giving her a good scare, Hungarian Jake Fen built an elaborate harness to make it look as if he had hanged himself. When his wife came home and saw him, she fainted. Hearing a disturbance, a neighbor came over and, finding what she thought were two corpses, seized the opportunity to loot the place. As she was leaving the room, her arms laden, the outraged and suspended Mr. Fen kicked her stoutly in the backside. This so suprised the lady that she dropped dead of a heart attack. Happily, Mr. Fen was acquitted of manslaughter, and he and his wife were reconciled.
Priests dont lie!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
A very distinguished lady was on
a plane arriving from Switzerland.
She found herself seated next
to a nice priest whom she asked:
Excuse me Father, could I ask a favor?"
"Of course my child, What can I do for you?"
Here is the problem, I bought myself a new sophisticated hair remover
gadget for which I paid an enormous sum of money. I have really gone
over the declaration limits and
I am worried that they will confiscate it at customs.
Do you think you could
hide it under your cassock?"
Of course I could, my child,
but you must realize that I can not lie."
You have such an honest face Father,
I am sure they will not ask you any questions",
and she gave him the 'hair remover'.
The aircraft arrived at its destination.
When the priest presented
himself to customs he was asked,
"Father, do you have anything to declare?"
From the top of my head to my sash,
I have nothing to declare, my son", he replied.
Finding this reply strange,
the customs officer asked
"And from the sash down,
what do you have?"
The priest replied, "I have there a marvelous l
ittle instrument destined for use by women,
but which has never been used."
Breaking out in laughter, the customs officer said,
"Go ahead Father.
Next...!"
a plane arriving from Switzerland.
She found herself seated next
to a nice priest whom she asked:
Excuse me Father, could I ask a favor?"
"Of course my child, What can I do for you?"
Here is the problem, I bought myself a new sophisticated hair remover
gadget for which I paid an enormous sum of money. I have really gone
over the declaration limits and
I am worried that they will confiscate it at customs.
Do you think you could
hide it under your cassock?"
Of course I could, my child,
but you must realize that I can not lie."
You have such an honest face Father,
I am sure they will not ask you any questions",
and she gave him the 'hair remover'.
The aircraft arrived at its destination.
When the priest presented
himself to customs he was asked,
"Father, do you have anything to declare?"
From the top of my head to my sash,
I have nothing to declare, my son", he replied.
Finding this reply strange,
the customs officer asked
"And from the sash down,
what do you have?"
The priest replied, "I have there a marvelous l
ittle instrument destined for use by women,
but which has never been used."
Breaking out in laughter, the customs officer said,
"Go ahead Father.
Next...!"
Thursday, January 19, 2006
Love & Happiness - By Sri Sri Ravishankar
True Laughter is Nothing But Heartfelt Prayer
When you begin your day in laughter and love,
your life gets divinely enlivened.
True prayer is laughing in the morning
both from outside and from deep inside.
Laughter comes from the centre of our Being,
from the core of our heart.
Our belly is so full of laughter that the laughter
permeates every cell in our body.
True laughter is true prayer.
When you laugh, the whole of nature laughs with you.
It echoes and resounds and makes life worthwhile.
When things go all right, everybody can laugh,
but when everything falls apart,
and yet you laugh, that is evolution and growth.
Nothing in life is more worthy than your laughter.
Never lose it. Events come and go.
Some are pleasant, and others, unpleasant.
There is some area deep in you that is left untouched.
Hold on to what is untouched.
Then you will be able to keep laughing.
Sometimes you laugh just to avoid thinking
or to avoid looking at yourself.
But when you see and feel within that
life is present and intense every moment,
nothing can bother you or touch you.
That laughter is authentic.
You might have observed babies,
six months or one year old.
When they laugh, their whole body is jumping and bouncing.
Every cell in the body is laughing.
That is enlightenment.
That laughter is innocent, pure, without inhibitions.
Opinions are the impressions we make on our minds.
If we have one experience repeated four or five times,
then, for the rest of our lives we tend
to see life through those same experiences.
We have not learnt how to retain
that innocence so that our minds
are not imprinted with definite opinions.
We need to be able to see things as they are.
When life’s essence blooms from within,
there is true laughter akin to godliness.
Godliness is a feeling of belonging.
We all belong to one another.
Laughter opens us up, opens the heart.
And anytime we don’t feel up to that innocence,
what do we do? “I feel tense,
I don’t feel that innocent or free.
What do I do?” You can attend to several layers
of your own existence. First, the body.
See if you have rested, eaten, and had some exercise.
Then attend to the breath. Breath has its own rhythm.
Every mood of the mind has a
definite rhythm in the breath.
By attending to the rhythm in the breath,
mind and body can be elevated.
Then look at the concepts
and opinions that hover in the mind.
Good, bad, right, wrong, should do,
shouldn’t do, all these could bind you.
Observe the thoughts. And then observe the feelings.
Every thought is associated with some sensation, some feeling.
Observe the sensation and feeling in the body.
Observe the rhythm in emotions.
We commit the same old mistakes.
I never say, “Don’t make mistakes”.
I say, “Make at least some new mistakes”.
The pattern, the rhythm in emotion is the same;
situations are different. It is like hanging the same
coat on different hooks. You have the same pattern
of emotions but you hang it on different causes,
people, circumstances, situations.
The peak of any emotion will lead you
ultimately to yourself — to your centre — by helping you take off to space.
When you begin your day in laughter and love,
your life gets divinely enlivened.
True prayer is laughing in the morning
both from outside and from deep inside.
Laughter comes from the centre of our Being,
from the core of our heart.
Our belly is so full of laughter that the laughter
permeates every cell in our body.
True laughter is true prayer.
When you laugh, the whole of nature laughs with you.
It echoes and resounds and makes life worthwhile.
When things go all right, everybody can laugh,
but when everything falls apart,
and yet you laugh, that is evolution and growth.
Nothing in life is more worthy than your laughter.
Never lose it. Events come and go.
Some are pleasant, and others, unpleasant.
There is some area deep in you that is left untouched.
Hold on to what is untouched.
Then you will be able to keep laughing.
Sometimes you laugh just to avoid thinking
or to avoid looking at yourself.
But when you see and feel within that
life is present and intense every moment,
nothing can bother you or touch you.
That laughter is authentic.
You might have observed babies,
six months or one year old.
When they laugh, their whole body is jumping and bouncing.
Every cell in the body is laughing.
That is enlightenment.
That laughter is innocent, pure, without inhibitions.
Opinions are the impressions we make on our minds.
If we have one experience repeated four or five times,
then, for the rest of our lives we tend
to see life through those same experiences.
We have not learnt how to retain
that innocence so that our minds
are not imprinted with definite opinions.
We need to be able to see things as they are.
When life’s essence blooms from within,
there is true laughter akin to godliness.
Godliness is a feeling of belonging.
We all belong to one another.
Laughter opens us up, opens the heart.
And anytime we don’t feel up to that innocence,
what do we do? “I feel tense,
I don’t feel that innocent or free.
What do I do?” You can attend to several layers
of your own existence. First, the body.
See if you have rested, eaten, and had some exercise.
Then attend to the breath. Breath has its own rhythm.
Every mood of the mind has a
definite rhythm in the breath.
By attending to the rhythm in the breath,
mind and body can be elevated.
Then look at the concepts
and opinions that hover in the mind.
Good, bad, right, wrong, should do,
shouldn’t do, all these could bind you.
Observe the thoughts. And then observe the feelings.
Every thought is associated with some sensation, some feeling.
Observe the sensation and feeling in the body.
Observe the rhythm in emotions.
We commit the same old mistakes.
I never say, “Don’t make mistakes”.
I say, “Make at least some new mistakes”.
The pattern, the rhythm in emotion is the same;
situations are different. It is like hanging the same
coat on different hooks. You have the same pattern
of emotions but you hang it on different causes,
people, circumstances, situations.
The peak of any emotion will lead you
ultimately to yourself — to your centre — by helping you take off to space.
Windshield thoughts of a 6 year old
One rainy afternoon I was driving
along oneof the main streets of town,
taking those extraprecautions necessary
when the roads are wet and slick.
Suddenly, my daughter, Aspen,
spoke up from her relaxed position in her seat.
"Dad, I'm thinking of something."
This announcement usually
meant she had been pondering
some fact for a while,
and was now readyto expound all that
her six-year-old mind had discovered.
I was eager to hear.
"What are you thinking?" I asked.
"The rain" she began, "is like sin,
and the windshield wipers are like
God wiping our sins away."
After the chill bumps raced up
my arms I was able to respond.
"That's really good, Aspen."
Then my curiosity broke in.
How far would this little
girl take this revelation?
So I asked...
"Do you notice how the rain
keeps on coming?
What does that tell you?"
Aspen didn't hesitate
one moment with her answer:
"We keep on sinning,
and God just keeps on forgiving us."
I will always remember this
whenever I turn my wipers on...
along oneof the main streets of town,
taking those extraprecautions necessary
when the roads are wet and slick.
Suddenly, my daughter, Aspen,
spoke up from her relaxed position in her seat.
"Dad, I'm thinking of something."
This announcement usually
meant she had been pondering
some fact for a while,
and was now readyto expound all that
her six-year-old mind had discovered.
I was eager to hear.
"What are you thinking?" I asked.
"The rain" she began, "is like sin,
and the windshield wipers are like
God wiping our sins away."
After the chill bumps raced up
my arms I was able to respond.
"That's really good, Aspen."
Then my curiosity broke in.
How far would this little
girl take this revelation?
So I asked...
"Do you notice how the rain
keeps on coming?
What does that tell you?"
Aspen didn't hesitate
one moment with her answer:
"We keep on sinning,
and God just keeps on forgiving us."
I will always remember this
whenever I turn my wipers on...
If you are a Dilbert fan, you'll definitely like these
Born free taxed to death
In a country of free speech, why are there phone bills?
When everything comes in your way
you're in the wrong lane
If you keep your feet firmly on the ground,
you'll have trouble putting on your pants
Smile, it makes people wonder what you are thinking
Life is unsure; always eat your dessert
first Marriage is one of the chief causes of divorce
Work is fine if it doesn't take too much of your time
It's not hard to meet expenses - they are everywhere
I love being a writer.... what I can't stand is thepaperwork
A printer consists of 3 main parts: the case,
the jammed paper tray
and the blinking red light
The hardest part of skating is the ice
If you tell a man there are
300 billion stars in theuniverse, he'llbelieve you.
But if you tell him a park bench has justbeen painted,
he has to touch it to be sure
If you cannot change your mind,
are you sure you haveone ?
Beat the 6 O'clock rush.
Leave work at noon !
I couldn't repair your brakes,
so I made your hornlouder
In a country of free speech, why are there phone bills?
When everything comes in your way
you're in the wrong lane
If you keep your feet firmly on the ground,
you'll have trouble putting on your pants
Smile, it makes people wonder what you are thinking
Life is unsure; always eat your dessert
first Marriage is one of the chief causes of divorce
Work is fine if it doesn't take too much of your time
It's not hard to meet expenses - they are everywhere
I love being a writer.... what I can't stand is thepaperwork
A printer consists of 3 main parts: the case,
the jammed paper tray
and the blinking red light
The hardest part of skating is the ice
If you tell a man there are
300 billion stars in theuniverse, he'llbelieve you.
But if you tell him a park bench has justbeen painted,
he has to touch it to be sure
If you cannot change your mind,
are you sure you haveone ?
Beat the 6 O'clock rush.
Leave work at noon !
I couldn't repair your brakes,
so I made your hornlouder
ShortArticle - Food Of Thought
"Didn't that bother you?" I asked my friend
once we were seated in the restaurant.
His reply amazed me.
"I never let anyone provoke me
for things I can'tchange,” he said quietly.
His answer was food for thought that was
much more nourishing than
the lunch we went on to share.
It became clear to me that
when I Iet myself fall into provocation trap,
I give upcontrol over my emotions,
which eventually hurts noone but me.
Has someone provoked you recently?
Stay out of thetrap!
So, don’t let anyone provoke you
for things youcant change…because it will only hurt you… :)
once we were seated in the restaurant.
His reply amazed me.
"I never let anyone provoke me
for things I can'tchange,” he said quietly.
His answer was food for thought that was
much more nourishing than
the lunch we went on to share.
It became clear to me that
when I Iet myself fall into provocation trap,
I give upcontrol over my emotions,
which eventually hurts noone but me.
Has someone provoked you recently?
Stay out of thetrap!
So, don’t let anyone provoke you
for things youcant change…because it will only hurt you… :)
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